


Just Kidding... Unless?

by sassywolf



Category: iKON (Korea Band)
Genre: Basically it's just dumb people trying to have sex but failed, Dirty Talk, Dumbass meet another Dumbass, M/M, Slice of Life, or maybe not?
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-04
Updated: 2019-09-04
Packaged: 2020-10-09 23:40:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,031
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20518358
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sassywolf/pseuds/sassywolf
Summary: [ 2 Unread Messages ]Junhoe: I can’t believe I’m going to say itJunhoe: I was watching porn last night and the girl kinda reminded me of you lol–or when Hanbin realized that his life gonna be more fucked up from now on.





	Just Kidding... Unless?

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by this post:  
https://etherealzodiac.tumblr.com/post/170550986125/aries-idea-of-romance#notes
> 
> Since Junhoe is Aries, so–

Friday means freedom. Freedom means you could be anti-social all day, all night, with bag full of chips and doing movie marathon in your room. The idea of being a homeguy for one day without stressing about work is absolutely amazing. Less people, less problem, more fun.

After he light up a sandwalwood candle, the scented candle which Yunhyeong gave him last month from his vacation in Bali– the atmosphere in his room is totally content. As a romantic person, Hanbin needs to settle his room as romantic as possible even though his aim wasn’t for sexual purpose– but for watching his long delayed anime nonstop from dusk ‘till dawn. 

He gets on the bed just to lay lazily beneath the blanket, while his eyes glued on the laptop screen on his lap. He’s already completed all the task for this week, so it’s totally alright for him to be this relaxed.

Though, a loud chirp from his phone make him groans. He swears he already declared ‘don’t text me today’ to his co-workers and declined all party invitations for today, _yet_ someone still annoy him by sending texts at peaceful time like this.

Eyes glaring to the poor phone– which is unnecessary because the sender can’t see his expression anyway, Hanbin take the phone quickly just to turn on silent mode. However, his eyes accidentally caught with a line of message in the notification center that make him off guard.

“The fuck,” he mumbled after seeing the new messages from the disturber– already forgetting his attempt to silence the phone.

> _[ 2 Unread Messages ]_
> 
> _Junhoe: I can’t believe I’m going to say it_
> 
> _Junhoe: I was watching porn last night and the girl kinda reminded me of you lol_

His eyes go wide, re-reading the messages for almost five times and unconsciously bites his forefinger while thinking for the best reply. Junhoe is nothing but a sword enemy to him. That younger guy always teased him or make fun of him when they were in college. Hanbin knows the younger was weird, but it’s really _weird_ of him to send messages like this.

He scrolled through their conversation, still thinking for the best and _safe_ reply. The last time they talked was two days ago, talking about sitcom and poetry. Nothing sexual, nothing flirty, just casual thing like they always talked back then during their college days. 

This time though, _is_ really make him lose his breathe.

> _Hanbin: I know I’m hot, but I’m not a girl lol_

Hanbin has no idea that he has been holding his breath for seconds away. He coughs when trying his best not to think about _stuff_, then settled for the simplest reply he could think of– not too flirty, not too whipped. Because he knows the younger man has no feeling for him, so it’s the best way to keep the relationship as platonic as he could.

No more than five seconds, the latter has replied to him. A reply that make him tossed his phone away and blushing furiously.

> _Junhoe: Yeah but thinking of you made me hard_

  
# # #

“You are so dumb, seriously.” 

Hanbin choked on his chocolate milkshake, glaring at his brutally honest best friend who just read his conversation with Junhoe.

“He was trying to get you for _weeks_, dumbass. It’s obvious and don’t tell me you have no idea at all,” Jinhwan added with frustration laced on his tone.

Hanbin sighed, say nothing and that’s enough to make Jinhwan sure about the answer. He can’t believe he has a _whole package meal _type of friend who’s still virgin because of his own stupidity. Seriously, if this guy _were_ a social butterfly like him, he could be the most wanted guy around the town.

It’s not Hanbin’s fault to lack with _stuff _like this. Having a special relationship is _just_ too weird for his life– _yet_ he still claim himself as a romantic dude. Anyway, it’s not like he doesn’t have imagination. He _does_ but it’s totally awkward for him to convert the imagination into a reality. Blame it to the zero experience in relationship.

Meanwhile, Jinhwan is the polar opposite with him. Although he has no plan settling down with someone in term of a relationship, the blond haired guy is way too comfortable with his sexual life. He has tons of experiment in life, with women _nor_ men, unlike him.

Jinhwan arched one of his eyebrows, “Don’t look at me like you want to murder me, bro. Go fix your pitiful sexual life instead.”

Hanbin groans, putting down the drink on the table and cover his face with his hands. “How?” he mutters quietly because he _really _doesn’t have any clue to fix it and Jinhwan just make the situation even harder.

The petite guy though, slurping on his iced americano like he doesn’t give a damn about his friend dramatic state. “Text him back, idiot. I can’t believe you left a horny man’s message on read.”

“I was watching _evangelion!_” Hanbin uncover his face and looks at him with wide eyes, just to defend himself. It makes the unbothered Jinhwan stand up a bit and hit his best friend’s head with his tiny hand. He didn’t sign up for this, _God_. He didn’t sign up to have a clueless friend like him.

Hanbin wasn’t lying– well, not fully. He was shocked and didn’t know what to reply so he just tossed his phone away and let himself drawn on his favorite anime. He forgot about the whole conversation for _hours_ and just went to sleep after that, forgot to reply Junhoe’s text. The very next day _aka _today, he was frustrated and called Jinhwan to help him fix this mess.

Jinhwan sighed, closed his eyes for mere seconds before opened again just to squint his small eyes at the man in front of him. "I can't help you. I have never been in a dumbass' shoes."

On second thoughts,

Jinhwan sighed. “Give me your phone, let _me_ make your sexual life less pitiful.” That’s the last sentence from Jinhwan before the said guy took Hanbin’s phone and makes Hanbin’s life _worst _than before.

Or that’s what Hanbin’s thought.

**Author's Note:**

> I love Junbin. That's all, that's the tweet.


End file.
